“when the healer cannot nameth the price, horatio, thou art not a patient but an opening bideth”
— william shakespeare, the merchant of venice, out-of-network editioneth
shakespeare never saideth this; billing remaineth undeterred
the patient asketh how much the procedure costs.
the doctor knoweth not.
the hospital knoweth not.
the insurer knoweth something but telleth it in a dialect spoken only by invoices.
six weeks later a parchment arriveth demanding an amount selected by a haunted wheel.
horatio what was purchased
a procedure
what did it cost
depends who asketh
what if the patient cannot pay
then the sickness acquireth a finance department
medicine hath performed a miracle
and billing hath performed another in which the number changeth when observed