“if thy refrigerator requireth an account perhaps thou hast accidentally made the refrigerator worseeth”
— william shakespeare hamlet act vi absolutely nonexistenteth
the light switch functioned reliably for one hundred and many years.
then mankind improvedeth it.
how
we connecteth it to the internet
why
so thou may turneth it on from anywhere
can i turneth it on from here
nay
why
the bulb requireth a firmware update
what doth the toaster require
an account
the toothbrush
bluetooth
the door
a subscription
horatio walketh outside where the sun continueth operating without login